--- title: Being a carer is not something God wants us to do alone date: 2026-08-19T11:19:00+01:00 author: Reuben Grace canonical_url: "https://www.eauk.org/news-and-views/being-a-carer-is-not-something-god-wants-us-to-do-alone" section: Articles --- Share [ ](https://www.facebook.com/dialog/share?app_id=1769260916495219&href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.eauk.org%2Fnews-and-views%2Fbeing-a-carer-is-not-something-god-wants-us-to-do-alone) [ ](https://x.com/intent/tweet?text=Being%20a%20carer%20is%20not%20something%20God%20wants%20us%20to%20do%20alone&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.eauk.org%2Fnews-and-views%2Fbeing-a-carer-is-not-something-god-wants-us-to-do-alone) [ ](https://www.facebook.com/dialog/send?app_id=1769260916495219&redirect_uri=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.eauk.org%2Fnews-and-views%2Fbeing-a-carer-is-not-something-god-wants-us-to-do-alone&link=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.eauk.org%2Fnews-and-views%2Fbeing-a-carer-is-not-something-god-wants-us-to-do-alone&display=popup) [ ](mailto:?subject=Shared%20from%20Evangelical%20Alliance&body=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.eauk.org%2Fnews-and-views%2Fbeing-a-carer-is-not-something-god-wants-us-to-do-alone) Copy link to this article Share this article Being a carer is not something God wants us to do alone 5 min read Contents Share [ ](https://www.facebook.com/dialog/share?app_id=1769260916495219&href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.eauk.org%2Fnews-and-views%2Fbeing-a-carer-is-not-something-god-wants-us-to-do-alone) [ ](https://x.com/intent/tweet?text=Being%20a%20carer%20is%20not%20something%20God%20wants%20us%20to%20do%20alone&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.eauk.org%2Fnews-and-views%2Fbeing-a-carer-is-not-something-god-wants-us-to-do-alone) [ ](mailto:?subject=Shared%20from%20Evangelical%20Alliance&body=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.eauk.org%2Fnews-and-views%2Fbeing-a-carer-is-not-something-god-wants-us-to-do-alone) Copy link to this article Share this article Back to top In this article #### Becoming the carer to someone you love is not something that people imagine will happen to them. And yet it does, more frequently than you might expect – around 4.3 million people become carers each year, according to Carers UK. It happened to me just over twelve years ago. When our third child came along and was diagnosed with a rare genetic condition, it became obvious that our family life would change, but it was only when one doctor looked at me and said, ​“I hope you don’t have a job”, that I first started to realise how huge this change might be. In the first couple of years, while there were obvious differences between the needs of my new son and other children, I did not perceive my role as his mum any differently. However, as my son got older, the medical interventions became more frequent and life-impacting. The intensity of physical, mental and emotional support he needed continued to grow in ways that it hadn’t with my other children and didn’t with other mums around me. This time, I realised the job description of mum was different. If it made it easier for others to understand that by labelling me a carer, then I was willing to take that title on. Being a carer has been, and continues to be, a huge privilege, but it is not easy. It is a privilege because I get to walk hand in hand with my son through some of the hardest and highest moments of his life. It is one of the hardest jobs for exactly the same reason. And, as a result, these experiences have changed me. Sponsored[](#) [ ![](data:image/svg+xml;charset=utf-8,%3Csvg%20xmlns%3D%27http%3A%2F%2Fwww.w3.org%2F2000%2Fsvg%27%20width%3D%271%27%20height%3D%271%27%20style%3D%27background%3Atransparent%27%2F%3E) ](https://www.trickortruth.co.uk/) Walking with him through his medical battles and witnessing his bravery, resilience and faithfulness has changed my perspective on life and faith. Despite absolutely feeling the presence and love of God with us and having new and precious insight into who God is, these experiences have raised difficult questions, forcing me to seek Him more intently, listen to Him and be open to different answers. It is because of these experiences that I sense being a carer is not a role that God wants us to do alone. As we have steadily adapted to our new ​‘normal’, it has become easier to spot others around us who face similar challenges, and I have found myself gravitating towards people who care for loved ones. While the details of our experiences are different, we share mutual feelings, understanding and questions about the unexpected situations we find ourselves in. This has made me look more closely at how I and our church, Rising Brook Baptist Church in Staffordshire*,* could be more intentional about supporting those who care for loved ones. > Being a carer is not a role that God wants us to do alone” After much time with those in similar circumstances, here are five ideas for how the church could do that: ### **1. Meet the needs of the people being cared for** Seeing my son’s needs understood and addressed not only communicates a genuine desire for welcome and inclusion but helps me, as his carer, to feel part of a community that is interested in our lives. Finding a way to regularly understand the needs within church communities is important, whether this be through surveys and feedback or discussion groups and designated people to talk to. ### **2. Designate a church leader, who holds both budget and authority to make decisions, to have inclusion as part of their role** Having someone in a leadership capacity personifies a church’s genuine desire to understand and include, and demonstrates a commitment to ongoing dialogue and action within a community where needs are ever-changing. ### **3. Encourage networks both formal and informal** Research shows that those who care for loved ones can feel socially isolated, so encouraging community is extremely important. One way we have done this in our church is through WhatsApp groups, set up between friends with similar caring responsibilities, to share information, provide support and pray for each other. These groups also socialise together when they are able. ### **4. Consciously make it part of the fabric of church** Addressing issues that impact carers as part of church activities and teaching makes the role, and its challenges, visible. This encourages open and honest dialogue. In our church, besides other initiatives, we have services that focus on living with disability. ### **5. Scripture-based teaching** Having Bible-based teaching that specifically focuses on the caring role will not only bring affirmation and value to this role but will help carers to reflect on their situations and process their questions. For example, passages such as Mark 2:1 – 12, provide the opportunity to reflect on scripture from a carer’s perspective. The 2021 Census showed there were 5.8 million unpaid carers in the UK. Data also shows millions of people each year move in or out of caring roles. Carers UK’s State of Caring 2025 report highlights just how much people can be affected by their caring role in terms of their own health, wellbeing and finances. Not only will there always be carers within our communities, those carers are likely to need support. As a church, we should be intentional about providing a safe space for carers to prayerfully process their role and provide the love and support that many desire to strengthen them as they support their loved ones. Caring is one of the best roles that someone can do, but it can also be one of the hardest. While we know that God walks with us in it, it is wonderful when our church communities walk alongside us on this journey too. --- ### About Lucy Khoneizer ![]()Lucy is a wife, mum and carer to one of her children. She has recently achieved an MA in theology and is passionate about using her training to understand more how God speaks through scripture to encourage and empower those who are differently abled and those who care for loved ones. 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