--- title: Why is motherhood unappealing to so many young women today? date: 2026-05-19T17:20:00+01:00 author: Anna Iliescu canonical_url: "https://www.eauk.org/news-and-views/why-is-motherhood-unappealing-to-so-many-young-women-today" section: Articles --- Share [](https://www.facebook.com/dialog/share?app_id=1769260916495219&href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.eauk.org%2Fnews-and-views%2Fwhy-is-motherhood-unappealing-to-so-many-young-women-today) [](https://x.com/intent/tweet?text=Why%20is%20motherhood%20unappealing%20to%20so%20many%20young%20women%20today%3F&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.eauk.org%2Fnews-and-views%2Fwhy-is-motherhood-unappealing-to-so-many-young-women-today) [](https://www.facebook.com/dialog/send?app_id=1769260916495219&redirect_uri=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.eauk.org%2Fnews-and-views%2Fwhy-is-motherhood-unappealing-to-so-many-young-women-today&link=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.eauk.org%2Fnews-and-views%2Fwhy-is-motherhood-unappealing-to-so-many-young-women-today&display=popup) [](mailto:?subject=Shared%20from%20Evangelical%20Alliance&body=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.eauk.org%2Fnews-and-views%2Fwhy-is-motherhood-unappealing-to-so-many-young-women-today) #### Motherhood is a "deeply unappealing prospect". That's the view of 54% of 18–35 women according to one survey. Most of the messaging I’ve received about motherhood in the media over the last few years has instilled this in me. Stories about birth trauma, the rise of the ​‘childfree’ movement and anti-natalist feminism have all permeated my Instagram feed. I’m told that children are a costly burden who will cause me to lose my sense of self, as well as my career, and if I choose to have them, I will be acquiescing to a form of gender inequality that comes with motherhood. At the age of 23 – the average age of a first-time mother in 1970 – I feel like the prospect of motherhood is so incredibly far removed from me. The reality is that many women will find themselves in an unexpected pregnancy at some point in their lives. As a university student, I overheard the flippant conversations about abortion that my peers had. It seemed like becoming a mother was the worst thing possible; the life of the unborn was pitted against the pregnant woman, whilst abortion was something you could be casual about. It’s hard to know how to respond in these moments, but as Christians, we need to be able to engage in the conversations about motherhood and abortion, so that we can speak with both love and truth. Sponsored[](#) [ ![](data:image/svg+xml;charset=utf-8,%3Csvg%20xmlns%3D%27http%3A%2F%2Fwww.w3.org%2F2000%2Fsvg%27%20width%3D%271%27%20height%3D%271%27%20style%3D%27background%3Atransparent%27%2F%3E) ](https://lst.ac.uk/event/blessed-trinity-conference/) As the statistic at the top of the article shows, I am not the only one who has been influenced by this new cultural narrative on motherhood. The polling from [Whitestone Insight](https://www.whitestoneinsight.com/birthgap) found that one of the most cited reasons for women aged 18 – 35 choosing not to have children is that ​“motherhood is a deeply unappealing prospect” (54%). We see this in our abortion rates, where close to 1 in 3 pregnancies now end in abortion. Whilst many factors go into the choice to terminate a pregnancy, views on motherhood will play a part. In [an article for The Free Press](https://www.thefp.com/p/why-are-so-many-british-women-getting), journalist Kara Kennedy spoke to 12 young women who had all had abortions recently, and not one of the women mentioned financial circumstances as a factor that led them to have an abortion. Instead, the recurring theme was that parenthood was a huge responsibility, and these women did not feel like they were good enough to be mothers. Motherhood is no longer seen as something you can grow into, but something you must be qualified for – and many of us feel unqualified for it. > ...as Christians, we need to be able to engage in the conversations about motherhood and abortion, so that we can speak with both love and truth.” Further, our cultural narrative has framed motherhood as a stumbling block to equality, an unfair burden that women must be rid of to achieve parity with our male counterparts. Our narrative of flourishing has been framed through a lens of individualism, one that values career and financial status as the measure of success, and having children is seen in direct opposition to this. This new narrative feels like a reaction to an idealised version of motherhood, one where the hardship that can come with motherhood was silenced. In wanting to rewrite the conversation about motherhood into a more balanced one, it has instead shifted into one where motherhood is seen as a form of oppression. Yet, [polling ](https://www.whitestoneinsight.com/birthgap)has also found that 72% of women believe that ​“society doesn’t value motherhood as much as it should”. Instead of succumbing to the way that our society views motherhood, we as Christians can tell a better story. Scripture shows us how mothers reflect part of God’s nature. Isaiah 66 shows God’s promise to comfort His people with the tenderness of a mother. The nurture, compassion, love and patience a mother has for a child reflects God’s heart towards us. Whilst I am not a mother, as I look at the mothers in my church, I see the joy their children bring to them and the love they have for them. I see the excitement they have at their children’s ​‘first’s’, such as their first step or first word. I see the way they beam when they relay a story where their child chose to pray for their friend at school or did something selfless for another child. I see the way motherhood looks different, where some mothers work, and some stay at home. When I look to the mothers around me, I see the beauty of motherhood portrayed, a small reflection of the love God has for his children. > When I look to the mothers around me, I see the beauty of motherhood portrayed, a small reflection of the love God has for his children.” Of course, it is undoubtedly true that parenthood, especially motherhood, requires sacrifice. It requires the nurture, love, care and protection of another human being. It might mean less time to yourself, sleepless nights, or a lifestyle change. Yet in the sacrifice of motherhood, we see a small glimmer of the ultimate sacrifice Christ made for us, laying down His life for us, those He loved before we loved Him; and in that, Hebrews 12:2 tells us that it was for the joy set before Him that Christ endured. If I were to ask any of the mothers in my church, they would tell me that their children bring them abundant joy that outweighs any of the hard parts. As the church, we have a role to play in shaping attitudes towards motherhood. Instead of motherhood being seen as a stumbling block to success, or a daunting burden, motherhood should be framed as much more – a chance to take part in a greater narrative beyond ourselves, a chance to mirror God’s character and love, and a chance for a life where our measure of success is much broader than an individualistic one. [ ![Why Mothering Sunday still matters](data:image/svg+xml;charset=utf-8,%3Csvg%20xmlns%3D%27http%3A%2F%2Fwww.w3.org%2F2000%2Fsvg%27%20width%3D%271%27%20height%3D%271%27%20style%3D%27background%3Atransparent%27%2F%3E) ![TWINS 5](https://eauk.org/cdn-cgi/image/format=auto,quality=90,width=400,fit=cover/https://cdn.eauk.org/TWINS-5.png) ](https://www.eauk.org/news-and-views/why-mothering-sunday-still-matters) [#### Why Mothering Sunday still matters ](https://www.eauk.org/news-and-views/why-mothering-sunday-still-matters) Dawn McAvoy, Both Lives UK lead points us back to the true meaning of this day and why we should continue to demonstrate hope and compassion as intended [ ![Dawn McAvoy](data:image/svg+xml;charset=utf-8,%3Csvg%20xmlns%3D%27http%3A%2F%2Fwww.w3.org%2F2000%2Fsvg%27%20width%3D%271%27%20height%3D%271%27%20style%3D%27background%3Atransparent%27%2F%3E) ](/author/dawn-mcavoy) [ Dawn McAvoy ](/author/dawn-mcavoy) 26 February 2026 [](https://www.eauk.org/news-and-views/why-mothering-sunday-still-matters) [ ![What Gen Z worries about: how the church can engage with a searching generation](data:image/svg+xml;charset=utf-8,%3Csvg%20xmlns%3D%27http%3A%2F%2Fwww.w3.org%2F2000%2Fsvg%27%20width%3D%271%27%20height%3D%271%27%20style%3D%27background%3Atransparent%27%2F%3E) ![Gen z Protest mick de paola unsplash](https://eauk.org/cdn-cgi/image/format=auto,quality=90,width=400,fit=cover/https://cdn.eauk.org/Gen-z-Protest-mick-de-paola-unsplash.jpg) ](https://www.eauk.org/news-and-views/what-gen-z-worries-about-how-the-church-can-engage-with-a-searching-generation) [#### What Gen Z worries about: how the church can engage with a searching generation ](https://www.eauk.org/news-and-views/what-gen-z-worries-about-how-the-church-can-engage-with-a-searching-generation) Lydia Gilbertson unpacks why Gen Z is searching for meaning and how the church can respond with hope and truth [ ![Lydia Gilbertson](data:image/svg+xml;charset=utf-8,%3Csvg%20xmlns%3D%27http%3A%2F%2Fwww.w3.org%2F2000%2Fsvg%27%20width%3D%271%27%20height%3D%271%27%20style%3D%27background%3Atransparent%27%2F%3E) ](/author/lydia-gilbertson) [ Lydia Gilbertson ](/author/lydia-gilbertson) 13 April 2026 [](https://www.eauk.org/news-and-views/what-gen-z-worries-about-how-the-church-can-engage-with-a-searching-generation) --- ### About Anna Iliescu ![]()Anna joined the Evangelical Alliance in September 2025 as the advocacy associate. Prior to this she graduated from King's College London with a BA in history and political economy. She loves staying active and enjoys running, hiking and bouldering in her spare time, and is always on the lookout for her next charity shop find. [See more from Anna Iliescu](/author/anna-lliescu)